The Real Housewife of Nigeria, Episode 12

The one where we head back to Nigeria

Do you remember the early days of post-covid?  The ones where Anthony Fauci became a medical celebrity and we all got in arguments about the efficacy and safety of face masks?  And finally, society threw in the epidemiological towel and started discussing and even embracing the concept of “re-entry?”  Do you remember the apprehension, anxiety and uncertainty of when you decided to re-enter the world?

That’s the best description I can give for the feelings I have about returning to Nigeria.  It's not just the deprivation of perfectly fried Chick Fil A nuggets and the new Starbucks chocolate cream cold brew that I’m dreading, it's the anxiety of living in an unstable place with so little infrastructure and resources should anything go wrong.

The family at Sleeping Bear Dunes National Park

As of this writing, the company has instructed us to defer any outgoing and incoming flights until further notice due to another protest. 

Except this protest is not like the other strikes we’ve weathered, because this one is not union led, its social media led.  To translate, at least the unions are kind enough to communicate all their strike plans to the government in hopes of reaching a negotiation.  Union led strikes are Jerry Mcguire begging Rod Tid well, to “help me, help you!” whereas social media protest plans are more volatile, and concerned with likes and going viral rather than making sure the government has been briefed.  Social media led protests are Moana and Maui running into Kakamora, a tribe of evil coconut-pirates. Within moments, the kakamora begin multiplying and one boat magically becomes 3 war ships.  In a moment of horror, Moana exclaims, “Their boat…is becoming more boats!”

With headlines such as “frustrated Nigerians vow ‘days of rage’…” (BBC) and “African cities sitting on a ‘keg of gunpowder’” (CNN), I’m not sad about sitting tight where we are currently: on a literal island next to a lake in Michigan.

current situation

For me, strikes and protests are frustrating because they put a halt to our plans and deter any feelings of real (or false) safety. 

But for Nigerians, this is their livelihood.  (I wrote about strikes in newsletter 7 as well.)  Currently, inflation in Nigeria is up 34%, the highest in over 30 years.  Add that to a high unemployment rate, corrupt government officials and a “booming business” of kidnapping, Nigerians are beyond desperate for change in their country.

Our departure date is set for August 11th, but I’m beginning to wonder if we’ll get to leave on time, or if Ray will be forced to start 2nd grade late. From what I’ve read, the strike is supposed to mimic a strike that took place earlier this summer in Kenya.  The Kenyan strike lasted 6 weeks and over 50 people died.

One thing Nigeria has been teaching me since we moved, is that we control so little. 

Less than we perceive, and certainly less than we prefer.  I was hoping this was just a Nigeria thing, but this over the summer echoed this for me, even in America.  (You can read about it in last month’s newsletter.)  As I write, my mom is still healing, and our Houston house is almost fully put back together except for a few hardware pieces in one bathroom. They should be installed next week.

What do we do when life reminds us of realities like the finite state of our bodies, and the fact that things often don’t go the way we’ve willed them to?

This last half of summer especially, I’ve found comfort in water.  I’ve experienced the water via jet skis, boats, simply jumping in the lake and even via water slides at various water parks.  Water doesn’t eradicate grief or unmet expectations, but it can help soften them.  Similar to the way ocean water glazes the surface of, buffs and dulls pieces of broken glass.

Also, glasses of Sangria don’t hurt.  THIS simple recipe from Minimalist Baker has been my go-to for years.  

In conclusion, I am sharing an excerpt of  a poem by Morgan Harper Nichols.  Fittingly, it's called, “Let July be July.” 

Even here, you are growing.
When August is approaching
and you feel a little restless
thinking about how
this month might end
and how
this year might end
and how you are supposed to
start again,
you are growing,
you are growing,
in grace
courage
strength…

So take heart
breathe deep
you are still becoming
who you were meant to be.

Let July be July.
Let August be August.
And let yourself

just be
even in
the uncertainty.
You don’t have to fix
everything.
You don’t have solve
everything.

And you can still
find peace
and grow
in the wild
of changing things.

Sunset from the dock

Camp news:

• I’m not in camp yet, but should be soon pending the end of the current strike, so camp news is back in the Newsletter.  Who hoo!

• First and foremost, I know from group chat that camp internet is out.  Again. According to the provider, it should be back soon…we’ll see.  

• Children’s committee is planning a fun back to school color run.  And by run, I mean speed-walk, slow-walk, or sit and eat crepes and drink mimosas while the kids do the physical activity and get color powder sprayed on them.

• Our first trip out of Nigeria will be in October and is almost fully booked.  We will be going to Legoland and Lego House in Billund, Denmark.  Did you know this is the birthplace of Lego?  After that we’ll head to Copenhagen for a few days.  (The kids don’t know about Legoland, so it'll be a fun surprise).  

Newsletter news:

• We are officially on a new platform called Substack!  What does this mean for you?

• If you're already subscribed you'll continue to get a monthly email, but now you can also easily share the link to anyone and they can read and/or subscribe on their own.   It also means you can binge all the newsletters easily by going HERE as they are now all in one digital campground together.  Best of all, you can like and comment on Newsletters now and I can comment back.  This could be super fun, right?

• Can you believe this is our 12th Newsletter? Originally, I was going to write them for our first year in Nigeria, but writing to all of you and hearing back is the most fun, so I’m going to keep them going.

Nigerian education moment:

Consider this your Nigerian and pop culture education moment.  In case you didn’t hear, Meghan Markel and Prince Harry did a 3 day visit to Nigeria in May.  Apparently Meghan is 43% Nigerian which is part of what motivated the trip.  While it wasn’t a formal royal tour as they aren’t technically working royals (but do royals really work?), it appeared to be their formal we-don’t-care-what-the-royals-think tour.  They did exactly what they would’ve done on a royal tour such as visit preschools, charities, hospitals and such.  This was a big deal for Nigeria, and honestly, while I don’t know the deets of the royal family drama, a story of rebellion always makes me a little happy. Harry’s memoir, Spare has been on my TBR list ever since they visited, but I haven’t gotten to it yet.  

Also, in case you need to know what Meghan wore each day she was in Nigeria, apparently people keep up with that kind of thing and you can see it all here.  I had no idea this was a thing to track and this is why I’m a writer, rather than a fashion influencer.  

While this doesn't really fit into a category of this newsletter, I need to share my favorite summer purchase:

I finally bought a pair of water-friendly Birkenstocks.  I may love them even more than my normal Birks.  They are lighter, cheaper, and even though the color I picked is “faded lime”, I’ve found they match everything. 

This is also why I’m a writer, rather than a fashion influencer.

Until next month,

Cheers y’all